The Hocker-Wilmot Conflict Assessment Guide Essay

The Hocker-Wilmot Conflict Assessment Guide Essay

Conflicts that arise in families may have a negative impact on family harmony. They affect both the participants and outsiders. As a rule, interpersonal conflicts in families depend on changes in relations and the emergence of repetitive behaviour and certain rules that create a new dynamics. It is possible to assess conflict patterns, applying the proper tools. Conflict assessment is a complicated process that requires proving a systematic collection of necessary information about the dynamics of a family conflict (Hocker & Wilmot, 2011). The Conflict Assessment Guide developed Wilmot & Hocker can be used to analyse a basic conflict in a family. One of the conflicts that arise in families is work-family conflict. According to researchers, family cohesion and relationship satisfaction can help to resolve a work-family conflict (Stevens et al. 2007). The application of the Conflict Assessment Guide allows finding the best option of conflict resolution.The Hocker-Wilmot Conflict Assessment Guide Essay

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Overview of the identified family conflict
The identified conflict is a work-family conflict which occurs in a family with low income. It has been found that the issue of finances is the major cause of conflict in Bob and Alice’s family. Bob is 36 and Alice is 35. They have a child aged 4 years old. The boy’s name is Steve. The scenario in this family is the following:

Bob and Alice are employed. They work at the same retailing company. Bob is an electrician and Alice is a manager. The key problem is that they lack enough money for recreation. However, they have enough money to buy sufficient food and other necessities, such as clothing, toys and medicine, pay bills and maintain mortgage. In this case, the family conflict is caused by work engagement. Alice’s job keeps her away from home most of the time, while Bob have to stay at home with the child. The child often feels neglected, disappointed, or even overwhelmed. At the same time, Bob realizes that if Alice becomes unemployed, this will lead to new stresses and interpersonal conflicts because of the lack of finances and the emergence of uncertainty about the future.The Hocker-Wilmot Conflict Assessment Guide Essay

The Hocker- Wilmot Conflict Assessment Guide
The Hocker- Wilmot Conflict Assessment Guide consists of a series of questions specially designed to identify and analyse the major components of conflict (Hocker & Wilmot, 2011, p. 163). This conflict assessment guide can be viewed as a useful tool in analysing the specific aspects of a family conflict in order to draw relevant conclusions. According to experts, the Hocker- Wilmot Conflict Assessment Guide serves as “a check on gaps in information about a conflict” ( Hocker & Wilmot, 2011, p. 163).

Nature of the Conflict
The triggering event that brought this family conflict into mutual awareness is the lack of father’s participation in the child’s development. It is known that employment participation of parents of young children may lead to misunderstandings. According to researches, “combining work and family roles can create conflicts with family life, but can also bring enrichment” (Cooklin et al., 2014, p. 266). In this scenario, work–family conflict experienced by the mother has a strong impact on the child’s home environments, for example, through parenting behaviour and the couple relationship. Bob and Alice’s child is only 4 years old. The parenting care demands for this age group is high.The Hocker-Wilmot Conflict Assessment Guide Essay

The historical context of this family conflict in terms of the ongoing relationship between the parties is the following: Bob is not satisfied with Alice’s decision to spend much time at work. He has to take care of his son alone. There are some external events within which the identified family conflict is embedded, including the absence of joint walks with Steve, the negative comments of Bob’s mother and criticism from their neighbours.In addition, the parties have assumptions about conflict that are discernible by their choices of conflict metaphors, behaviour patterns, and clear expressions of their attitudes about conflict.The Hocker-Wilmot Conflict Assessment Guide Essay

Bob demonstrates irritation because of his wife’s ignorant behaviour. He often raises objections concerning Alice’s propositions to participate in conversation. Alice demonstrates patience. She treats her husband with indifference and avoids discussion of her behaviour. Actually, their conflict can be categorized as conflict like war. Bob is hopeless and, at he same time, he tries to change the situation. Alice wants to remain calm.

Conflict elements:
The struggle is being expressed differently by each party. Bob is focused on communicative approach to make his wife feel that her son needs her attention, love and care. Alice is focused on expression of ignorance. She behaves as if nothing can happen. The perceived incompatible goals are the following: Bob wants his wife to take care of their child. He insists on his wife’;s leaving the job.The Hocker-Wilmot Conflict Assessment Guide Essay

Alice is aimed at achieving success in her professional career. She is a front-line manager. She needs a promotion to become a senior manager. In this case, her authority will be broader in scope. The perceived scarce rewards are money and time. The parties are interdependent in a way that they have their child who needs their love and care. They are interfering with one another in the following ways: Bob continues to insist on the need to change Alice’s relation to her family, while Alice keeps silence and does not alter her schedule. She spends 12 hours at work everyday. She comes home when her child is sleeping in the evening. She leaves for her work when he is sleeping in the morning. Bob and Alice are cooperating to keep the conflict in motion when they talk over the phone every three-four hours. In addition, this family conflict vacillated between productive and destructive phases because on the one hand, Bob and Alice have no aggression, on the other hand, the tension in their relations is obvious. The tension is growing because of the unresolved problem. The elements which were transformed during the productive cycles are mutual awareness of the need to avoid aggression and violence and negotiating interdependence, as well as balancing interdependence and independence in order to strengthen stability in family relations, and at the same time make changes in behaviour patterns. There are several elements that might be transformed by creative solutions to the conflict, including perceived scarce resources and perceived incompatible goals. Both Bob and Alice recognize that their separation will have a negative impact on their child. Recent study shows that “kindergarten children’s representations of parent-child relationships moderate the impact of parental separation on the development of conduct problems, and underline play and narration as a possible route to access the thoughts and feelings of young children faced with parental separation” (Stadelmann et al., 2010, p. 92). Currently, Steve has insignificant conduct problems which can be addressed by his parents’ involvement in the daily activities.The Hocker-Wilmot Conflict Assessment Guide Essay

Styles of Conflict
In this scenario, each party used certain individual styles which affected further selection of conflict resolution. Bob selected the position to stand his ground. Standing one’s ground is a serious decision which requires courage and assessment of other party’s views on the issue. By standing his ground, Bob is competing with Alice. He tries to do everything he can to win the battle and make Alice change her job or employer. Undoubtedly, this approach can be detrimental to their relationships because Alice opposes this decision. Her style is avoiding the conflict. She pretends that it never happened. She pretends that there is nothing wrong with her son whom she sees every day. During the course of the conflict the individual styles changed. Bob perceived the style of Alice when he became more compromising. Bob’s style reinforced the choices made by Alice as the conflict progressed.The Hocker-Wilmot Conflict Assessment Guide Essay Actually, the style choices became complementary. From an external perspective, the advantages of Bob’s style within this particular conflict were lack of aggression and mutual understanding. The disadvantage of Bob’s style was negative impact on interpersonal relationships. The advantages of Alice’s style were minimal level of disagreement and lack of aggression. The disadvantages of Alice style were fostering tension and failure to meet long-term goals. The overall system can be characterized as having a predominant style because the participants were focused on maintaining positive relationship as a whole. From an external perspective, this conflict system can be placed in terms of cohesion and adaptability. The other system descriptions would not aptly summarize the system dynamics.The Hocker-Wilmot Conflict Assessment Guide Essay

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udes about their power. Bob demonstrated his power when he gave recommendations to Alice regarding the effects of her job on family relations. Alice demonstrated her power when she avoided any discussions about her job. Both parties do not talk openly about power. They try to avoid discussing it. The parties see as their own and the other’s dependencies on one another, such as their relationships. As an external observer, I can classify some dependencies that they do not list, including language and intimacy. Power currencies the parties see themselves and the other possessing include Resource Control, Interpersonal Linkage, Communication Skills. From an external perspective, power currency of which the participants are not aware seem to be operating is Expertise.

The parties disagree on the balance of power between them through communication. They do not underestimate their own or the other’s influence. Each party’s assessment of power has certain effects on subsequent choices in the conflict. The evidence of destructive “power balancing” is Bob and Alice’s communication by phone. Bob seems to be very aggressive, but at the same time, he avoids tension. Alice feels disappointed when Bob faults her for her ignorance. Observers of the conflict agree with the parties’ assessments of their power. Some unused sources of power that are present include control over others and charisma.The Hocker-Wilmot Conflict Assessment Guide Essay

Goals
The parties clarify their goals using emotional expression of their needs and plans. Both Bob and Alice are self-confident people. They set goals to achieve positive results. However, Alice does not phrase them individualistic or system terms, while her husband Bob does it regularly. Each party thinks about the other’s goals. Bob realizes that Alice is focused on her career development. Alice realizes that Bob wants her to be less influential than he is. They are similar to the perceptions of self-goals. The goals have not been altered from the beginning of the conflict to the present. The prospective goals are similar as Bob and Alice want to maintain their family relations. The transactive goals are similar as Bob and Alice can change their goals as a result of their interactions. Retroactive goals are similar as both Bob and Alice can make sense of their conflict and even learn from it. The content goals are Bob and Alice’s intentions in this situation. Bob’s content goal is to make Alice spend more time at home, with their child. Alice’s content goal is to spend more time at work in order to get promotion. The relational goals place emphasis on the parties’ marital status. Bob realizes that he is Alice’s’ husband and Alice realizes that she is Bob’s wife. Each party’s translation of content goals into relationship terms is based on mutual understanding of the situation. The two sets of translations correspond because both parties want to save their family.

Tactics
The participants appear to strategize about their conflict choices. They do not remain spontaneous because Alice believes in her ability to persuade Bob of her job’s usefulness, while Bob believes that his strategy aimed at criticizing his wife’s behaviour is effective in this situation. Each party views the other’s strategizing in the same way. Bob and Alice have a good understanding of their skills and abilities. Hence, Bob is aware of Alice’s plans, while Alice is aware of her husband’s plans. The tactical options used by both parties are based on their goals. Bob wants to be engaged in conflict, while Alice wants to avoid it. The tactical options classify primarily into competition tactics as neither Bob nor Alice want to reside. They continue to hold their ground. The participants’ tactics is mutually impacting on the other’s choices because Bob and Alice are interdependent. Bob is aware of the need for having enough money to pay bills, maintain mortgage and buy necessary items. Alice is aware of the need for taking care of the child. The tactics are interlocking to push the conflict through phases of escalation, maintenance, and reduction because Bob and Alice do not think about divorce. They just need time to resolve their problem.The Hocker-Wilmot Conflict Assessment Guide Essay

Assessment
There are several rules of repetitive patterns that characterize this conflict, including rules of communication and rules of relationships. Bob and Alice do not keep silence. They communicate effectively, face-to-face, by phone and online. In addition, Bob and Alice maintain their interpersonal and intimate relationships. Quantitative instruments cannot be used to give information about the elements of this family conflict.The Hocker-Wilmot Conflict Assessment Guide Essay

Self-Regulation
The parties perceive the following options for change: to hire a babysitter, to change jobs (both for Bob and Alice) or to invite relatives (Bob’s mother or Alice’s aunt) in order to take care of the child. The philosophy of conflict that characterizes the system can be described as recognition of the need for finding the proper solutions to the problem. The techniques for self-regulation or system-regulation that have been used thus far include the application of stress management skills and the use of emotion control techniques (listening to music, reading books, using aromatherapy). These techniques might be used productively by the system.

Attempted Solutions
There are several options that have been explored for managing the conflict, including to have a meaningful dialogue, to use external resources, such as nursing services and relatives’ support, or to explore other options, without external influence. The attempted solutions have not become part of the problem because Bob and Alice are aware of the negative effects of these factors on their family relationships. Third parties have not been brought into the conflict because Bob and Alice try to resolve their problems without the use of psychologists’ recommendations or their relatives’ advice. This family conflict is not a repetitive one. The attempted solutions provide change in Bob and Alice’s relationships. The identified categories of attempted solutions that have not been tried include using the assistance of friends, changing work schedules or using all-day kindergarten services.The Hocker-Wilmot Conflict Assessment Guide Essay

Conclusion
Thus, it is necessary to conclude that the Conflict Assessment Guide developed Wilmot & Hocker can help to better understand the nature, causes and consequences of a family conflict. In this scenario, this assessment tool helps to identify the best option of conflict resolution. For Bob and Alice, the best option is to high a babysitter. In this case, the child will be provided with development opportunities, while parents will be able to earn money to pay bills, maintain mortgage and buy food and other necessary items, like toys, medicine., etc.The Hocker-Wilmot Conflict Assessment Guide Essay

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